Thursday, November 10, 2005

Just when I let my guard down

Took Mom to her oncologist's office this afternoon for an appointment to review her blood work from last week and then get treatment afterwards. They decided to skip her chemo last week due to not having some important results. Since my mom has been so fatigued, they decided to give her body an extra week of rest.

I tried to talk to her on the way to the doctor, but she would not talk. I am pretty good at talking about difficult subjects, but this was different. She wasn't budging and actually got irritated with me for probing. As we waited for the N.P. to come into her exam room, her irritation got stronger. She was really upset to be waiting. I tried to keep up the banter, but she wanted none of it.

Then the news came and it was not good. Her blood work showed some liver distress or malfunction. It also showed problems with her kidney and her cancer tumor marker went up - not significantly, though. It was definitely a strike out.

Cat scan tomorrow. Results on Monday. It could be her chemo or it could be the cancer. Neither answer is better than the other.

I made pot roast tonight. I even made gravy. She seemed to like it. I held her hand after dinner for a little while and she let me.

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