Harrison's birthday party last Saturday (only two months late) at a rock climbing gym
I have had some time to focus on myself the last two days while the kids have been in day camps. I've spent the time looking for work. What an arduous, awful job. One thing that's different, since the last time I did this, is the "open" job postings. They list a great job - something that I feel I'd be really good at - and then when I make an inquiry call, I'm told the same thing. The company or college doesn't have an opening at this time, but they like to collect resumes for the future. Just in case. It kind of reminds me of a false ad - you go into the store to get the item that is advertised on sale, but find out that they don't have that model.
I still want to explore working from the house. Possibly try to sell photos or something. Ella suggested that we decorate foam frames (like these) and fill them with "pretty pictures." I'm sure we could make a couple bucks (selling to family and friends), but I doubt it would pay the mortgage. I have high hopes for starting anew, but I think I need to explore the "work from home" ideas I have in the evening, AFTER a consistent-paying day job.
That leads to the whole idea of giving up. I feel if I get a "regular" full time job, I won't seriously work at pushing myself to start my own business. Why does it have to be that way? I think it's because I don't feel comfortable changing the entire lifestyle for the rest of my family just so that I can fulfill a dream.
It's that female guilt thing.